You might find that your child can never seem to just focus on one task. They jump from game to game, screen to screen, and now with more online schooling, it seems to be getting even worse.
It is possible to foster greater concentration – but to do this you’ll need to set up a few hands-on activities with real, child-sized tools (my top 12 items) that they can repeat over and over – and then be willing to let the child truly focus. We tend to interrupt children without even realizing it.
Let’s see what happened with Luke and Teresa. Their daughter Gianna, who had recently turned 4, was hyper and boisterous, like many other children. Often she was given one of their phones to play games, watch videos, or sing songs – all of which were “educational and parent-approved.”
We initially started working together as they were struggling with Gianna ignoring their pleas, getting angry over small matters, or being so hyper they could not get anything done.
It only took a beautiful and fragile material that fit in Gianna’s tiny hands to get her excited about order. After Teresa showed her the process for flower arranging, she stepped back and let Gianna work.
For the next 20 minutes, Gianna continued to repeat the activity – filling her small, glass pitcher with water to pour it into a glass or porcelain vase that she had chosen. Gianna loved cutting the flowers to size with child-sized scissors and placing the vase on a doily at various places in the home.
Oblivious to what was going on around her, they noticed that her body was calm and her eyes intently focused on this activity. In the past, Luke and Teresa would have interrupted her by trying to help her carry her pitcher, telling her “good job”, or only letting her do one vase/flower.
Now they knew that a child should be free to repeat the activity as many times as she wants and not to interrupt a child who is concentrating. They also now understood that it was about the process, not the product. The flower didn’t have to be cut perfectly nor the vase filled to just the right amount of water.
Seeing her engaged in her work with a peaceful joy (for 20 minutes!) was a welcomed sight indeed! With more activities like this set up and available for Gianna to work on, the temptation to give her their phone quickly declined.
As you’ve seen, it’s important that the adult learn when to intervene and when not to, for unnecessary help can impede the child’s development.
***When you are ready for the third reason in this series, head on over to Why Catholic Families Struggle to Develop Their Child's Full Potential- Part 3 of 3
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